I have made this partly as a mediative practice for my own purposes. As we are nearing the completetion there is so many different types of activity from the simply practicalities of van hire to the nuances of programming and movement. I am completing the cutting and as the process ends I am reflecting on if it has been what I wanted and looked for.
I was perhaps experiencing this more as an endurance test rather than a meditation, then as I was working I noticed a sensation of immense expansion and deep calm that has been on periphery of my experience and is now starting to flood in on making. In the same way as we might leave our everyday experience but still be present this brings a sense of connection with the space around me.
So I am both relieved that the work is ending and have trepidation about its; absence- in a way all changes have difficulty, even when they are a relief. I have a sense of thrill that I might be able access this work space in myself in the future. To me this expansive sensation has come about through practice – a disciplined repetition. I find it is a safe and tranquil space to make something. It needs you to make it and you have to do it. Like a completed cycle in which the energy and impetus flows. Making this has taught or affirmed that. There is no purpose in wondering whether what you have made is good or bad or will be liked or not. It’s only purpose is to exist and for you to bring that about open heartedly with the skills that you practice and learn about.
I am now packing the work and can see that not all the individual pieces are successful, with a choice I would edit them back but the installation space requires bulk.
As we are getting closer to the installation the effort and attention to detail from everyone in incredible. Each member of this team of people gives there all without exception. Technical set up is being combed over by Luke Woodbury and Faser Kent. Sean Clark and Graeme Stuart are working through the programming . Graeme and I are figuring out how to compose the best set up to give the work the most fluid and interesting lighting through the composition of the real lights and how they are read by the programming virtually.
I am piercing each piece with it’s supporting rod and packing them into enormous sacks. I do not know exactly how the work will look and am curious and nervous to meet it. In making something for the first time there can be no guarantee that it will be greater than the sum of it’s parts. My effort is to not look at the bigger picture but to stay sincerely inside the process, the place I am most at ease to be.